How to Talk to Your Kids About the News

As I write this, the President of the United States has been impeached for the second time. Last week there was an insurrection at the Capitol, and in a week from now a new President will be inaugurated (and we’ll have the first ever woman of color in the oval office!). COVID-19 is still very much a problem too. It’s a LOT going on. It’s a lot for us to process as adults, and it can be just as confusing and scary for our littles too.

The tension in our country (okay, in our world) is nothing new. It’s not something that all of a sudden popped up on January 6th, or back on election day, or even with the death of George Floyd. Nope, it’s been happening for a very long time – affecting some more so that others – and that’s a lot of stress to carry around. 

So, with this post, I want to tackle two things: how to take care of yourself as a parent while dealing with everything happening and how to talk to your kids about everything happening.

Parenting While Fearful, Stressed, and Confused

When you get on an airplane, they always tell you to put your oxygen mask on first before helping others – and that applies to parenting too.

If you’re feeling overwhelmed, that’s okay. It’s almost impossible not to feel that way.

Take a moment and evaluate your feelings

I encourage you to take some quiet time to figure out and really feel your feelings. It’ll be difficult to help your littles navigate their feelings if you’re having trouble with yours.

Remember you’re the adult in the room

For the most part, your littles will learn how to react based on how you react. If you need to lock yourself in the bathroom for a few minutes to gather your thoughts, then do so. Just don’t blow in front of your littles in a way that might scare or really upset them.

Shut things off and focus on being present

When we’re in the middle of chaos, it’s so tempting to leave the news on and ‘doomscroll’ to try and keep up with it all – but try to resist that urge. Disconnecting is good for your mental health, and being present with your kids reinforces the fact that you are there for them and that they can trust you (even in the middle of chaos).

How to Talk to Your Littles About Everything That’s Happening

Common Sense Media (a nonprofit that reviews tech and media for families) recommends waiting until your children are around seven to expose them to the news, since that’s typically the age they’re able to determine “what’s real and what’s fake, what’s near and what’s far, what’s possible and what’s highly improbable” (according to Jill Murphy, vice president and editor in chief at Common Sense Media). 

The news is everywhere though, so it’s hard to keep our littles totally in the dark about current events. So when they do start consuming and start having questions, try these three tips.

Be honest

It’s so important for us to be totally honest with our littles. Don’t lie about or try to hide what’s going on (especially if they’ve already been exposed to the news). Instead be honest and have open conversations as a family. When you’re honest with your littles, they’ll be honest with you down the line in return. This dialogue opens up and sets a foundation for channels of communication.

Make space for their questions and confusion

This might sound backwards, but sometimes letting our littles know that we don’t have all the answers is actually comforting. Give them space to ask you questions and tell you what they’re worried about – then talk it out and help them process. 

Give them context

Start your conversations by asking questions to figure out what they know first. While it’s important to be honest, you also don’t want to overshare or over-explain things, that might confuse them more or even scare them. Kids tend to focus on how current events affect them, so give them context for what’s happening and how it doesn’t (or may) actually affect your family.

One thing that’s important to note…

If your child has seen the news and seems to be more scared or worried during the night or has more nightmares, let’s comfort them and let them know they are safe. You can also let them know many of those people have already been arrested (the police took them in), and how great is it that they got them already. A little more TLC may be warranted during this time, and don’t worry if all your hard work with their sleeping gets a little disrupted right now. You know you can always get back on track.

Find me on Instagram and let me know ways you’ve been coping with the news and what questions your littles have brought up – @healthylittlesleepers.


Additional resources:

Susie Menkes